Karnov Love Thread

At the request of Roth, I proudly bring you...

DANCE DANCE Karnov!

Also, at the request of Roth, I proudly bring you...

DANCE DANCE Karnov!

Who in the world developed that? Rockstar North?

....

And it is quite obvious that Roth has a Karnov fetish.

SSHHHHHH!

Alright... alright.... I have a Karnov fetish as well.... is it so wrong? Karnov is the end all perfection of humanity. I strive to be one with Karnov. Karnov is what keeps me going day after day after day. If not for Karnov, I would not be. Karnov is, simply put, Karnov. If not for said person (Karnov), I would be homeless in a gutter somewhere. Karnov has given me inspiration. Quite simply.... Karnov is.

It's true. No mere mortal man can measure up to the alpha-male standard that is "Karnov".
Women swoon at the site of him. They throw themselves at his feet. They use large feathers and "fan" him while feeding him fruit on a hammock.
He is truly essence of manly perfection. Let's face it. We can't compete.

Oh if I could only be like him. I hate it when I'm with the woman of my dreams (for the evening), and when in the throws of passion she accidently screams "Oh Karnov!" - It is quite disheartening...
(especially seeing how she isn't even in the same room with me at the time).

But still I must try. I can grow a mustache. I can get really fat. I can get even balder. Maybe sprout at least ONE wing.

But still...

"Karnov" I will never be...

For all of you Quake III fans, here is something for you... You TOO can enjoy the luxury of Karnov! It's a skin that allows you to be... Karnov!!!

Enjoy! I'm sure Roll will!

And it is quite obvious that Roth has a Karnov fetish.

Who DOESN'T have a Karnov fetish? can you honestly say that fat, bald, moustashed russian men don't excite you? And on top of all of those features, he can SHOOT FIREBALLS, and SPROUT WINGS. I know my girlfriend has threatened to leave me for Karnov a few times... she says I need to be more fat, and more bald, and more moustashed, and especially more russian, just like Karnov.

Oh no! my secret is out! Now the whole world will know of my uncontrollable love for that perfect example of manliness that is Karnov. If anyone knows where I might find this perfect specimen of manhood, they should contact me immediately!

Not satisfied with Luke?
Don't announce your cheatings on the board, Luke's here quite often.

uh... I'm not sure what that meant... but I deleted it....

I didn't write something like "Applesquash"... I don't even know what that means.

Wait! You just wrote it .

...?
Or typed it.

Anyway, this is getting out of hand. "Applesquash" is good and all, but this is really supposed to be all about "Karnov".

Ok ok, let's get back to fat old Karnov.

hehehe ... and on that note, here's what the stud looked like on the Commodore 64(unfortunately)!

...AND if you happen to have an emulator for said system, here are some cheat codes, though I'm not sure if you could use them...

Karnov was the first boss in "Bad Dudes"? I must investigate this further...

as for him being evil, I can't imageine that. I always thought he was just a heroic carny out to save the rest of his circus friends...

Yes, he was the first boss in Bad Dudes! Check out this typed booklet, and read under the section called 'The City (Level 1).'

I always thought that there was more to the story, like the Dragon Ninja had kidnapped his family, but I can't remember where I had read that so many years ago...

As for him being evil? Naw...

Ever wondered just how Karnov actually looks up close to his face? Well, you're reading the right thread then, because I've got a link for you!

I had always seen screenshots for this game, but never have I seen Karnov's face like this! I'm talking about Karnov's Revenge. A fighting game not-unlike any of the Street Fighter 2010 series. Have a look.... BUT BEWARE! Those that are strongly attracted to Karnov may not be able to control themselves, and perform unholy things with their monitors....

It doesn't look that bad.
Seeing such a picture... doesn't it really make to want to kick in his face?

Blasphemer! None shall harm Karnov! Blade and Striker thought they could do it... but failed miserably... none shall harm Karnov!!!

Then let me formulate it in a less "active" way.

That picture makes me want (as a player of that game) that Karnov falls on my foot or run into my elbow with his face. (Then that's not my fault.)

Sorry for the blasphemy, but I'm no member of Karnovology.

None shall mock Karnov!

EDIT: for all those with an insatiable desire to see Karnov less dressed than usual:

EDIT2: not sure what I can say about this one... but it has more Karnov

and more:

even more:

wow, a lot of these have Karnov:

Those are funny!

I might even join you in Karnov worship...

It doesn't look that bad.
Seeing such a picture... doesn't it really make to want to kick in his face?

actually, I played that game a little last night, and oddly enough, that image of the godly Karnov is just a TV image, at the end of the intro a fist smashes it

but joking aside, it's a solid game if you have a controller or arcade stick for the PC, I suggest checking it out with the beauty of MAME (but only for 24 hours, after that it's illegal if you don't own the arcade PCB )

and for anyone building a Karnov shrine, I suggest this: as the centrepiece.

EDIT:

EDIT 2: fixed the link.

I can't see what you were to show to us!

But I think I found it on that site.
Who drew that? His head's looking so weird...

that game is hilarious! Music is annoying and i got bored of playing it!

I just played the NES ROM. It's good. As for me having a Karnov Fetish? NO WAY!

Yeah me either lol! How is that possible

Ah... if anyone would like to see the shrine I designed for the original NES game of Karnov, click this link...

I put it together in a short amount of time, but it was fun!

A Karnov shrine!!! Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

And that ending... that's really SPECTACULAR.
I wish they put so much effort into other games, too.

I like the Karnov with wings icon.

Good work. That shrine looks nice.

you made that?
Lol is that really how it ends cause that would be so lame

As far as I know, that's the whole ending.

If you want to know more about NES game endings, look here:

Thanks for the link Manuel! Going there now.

How can they get away with that kind of ending lol!

Perhaps they didn't have any NES ROM space left?
Just a guess.
Or they didn't know how to make a good ending?
Maybe.
They were already over the deadline and didn't have more time to create an ending?
You can speculate a lot...
I feel sort of cheated when I get such an ending, though.

The Megaman games always have good endings.

yeah but they could have at least made him jumping up and down with his arm raised or something! I mean that cant take long!

By the way whats the storyline in the game? I mean whats the reason you're fighting those things?

Treasure. The great Jinborov Karnovski is hunting for the treasure of babylon, guarded by tha ancient dragon Ryu. he must overcome many obstacles along the way, great chasms to cross, oceans to swim, but none of these will slow the great fire-breathing strongman, Karnov.

Aargh! That is NOT the real Karnov! That is an obvious imposter!
The Karnov is much more handsom. Much more manly. Much more...
...fat.

(The guy in that picture is built more like from the X-Men comics or something.)

You're right. It's much less abnormal to have a "Tetra fetish" or "shoe fetish" or maybe even an "alpaca fetish".

Worth posting that image again.

I stumbled upon a Karnov NES level select... though I would rather go through the whole game from the beginning!

I tested it, and it works perfectly! Not hard to do either.

I got this cool new .gif animation program, and I've been wanting to try something out with it.

I really thought NES-Luke's avatar could have used a little bit more "action".

So this is what I came up with...

Many apologies.

Not bad man, not bad.

I like that hip swing...

oh, that's great! I would use it as my new avatar, but some may not be able to control themselves after seeing that. I wouldn't want to be responsible for their actions...

I always knew that Karnov was "hip." ba doomp doomp pssshhhh...

Uh...

Anyhow, some of the rights to Data East games were purchased.

Hopefully we'll see some Karnov!

Karnov in high definition on Revolution, PS3 and XBox 2?

You can see every wrinkle on his fat yet masculine body...

BACK TO THE TOP OF THE BOARD
Karnov WILL NOT BE IGNORED!

Behold his mighty/unfortunate .

Karnov in Thailand (is it Thai?)? ...
That seems like an interesting homepage (where the pic is from). If only my Thai was a little bit more fluent...

Hey, the Karnov Love Thread gets an update

When Manuel posted the link to the pics for Karate Champ on the Bloodsport thread, I couldn't help but notice that there were two Karnov games! Ha!

There was this version of the Karnov arcade:

...and then there was the Japanese version of the Karnov arcade:

The Japanese version seems to have the items on the top of the screen, and the player info on the bottom... reversed from the other version!

The Japanese version seems to have the items on the top of the screen, and the player info on the bottom... reversed from the other version!

Also, the Japanese version is stupidly easy, I've played them both using MAME, and the concentration of enemies in the Japanese one isn't even CLOSE to the North American one. check it out some time.

Why can I not find this game in the UK?
I could emulate it, but i'd much rather have the cartridge.
I've tried looking on ebay every day for 6 months to no avail. Is it super rare or something in PAL regions?

It's super duper mega rare in PAL regions, i.e. it wasn't released here. I think we just weren't cool enough for Karnov.

If you want to see what other NTSC games didn't get PAL releases check this list. It makes for depressing reading.

Wow, that is rather depressing, I would like to have checked out many of those games. Guess i'll have to get an emulator.
Yeah, Karnov is too cool a cat for us, I suppose. Maybe Karnov was denied political asylum over here haha.
Thanks for you help, Daynum.

That's right! More Karnov Love has been discovered! Does anyone here remember the LCD games that were released for different games? Well, a site has now been found that has those games on it! Guess what?... Yup....

Enjoy, faithful Karnov followers!

OH My GOd Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

thats so cool, I used to have some tomcat game and mortal Kombat ones.

Well, good ol' Karnov was up for Best Non-Popular character on the NES over at NES Nation, but it seems he got inched out by Mike from Star-Tropics... non-charasmatic character that he is.

We tried man, we tried.

Karnov is going to be well mad when he finds out.

Even I got Karnov yesterday.

I never heard of Karnov when I was a kid. Guess I was way too uncool.

Daynum its the same for me, sadly to say

You were "warned"...

Since I know how much everyone loves Karnov, I took a picture of my husband's cassette.......

You have the COOLEST Karnov memorabilia on the board! I want that! Where did you or your husband find that?

Is that Music? Or what? it looks strange.

I think it's a Sinclair Spectrum game. Or a Commodore 64 game.

A "Tape Drive" works much like a "Floppy" or "Zip" drive. It can be used to both "read" and "write" data onto.
The information is stored on analog cassette tapes, and is transferred to the computers RAM.

In this case, the 'Karnov' game is playable from the RAM and not the actual cassette itself. The data is on one linear track, so it needs to take time to seek it out.
Most of the early games that used it were logicly constructed so that little "seeking" was necessary.

(NOTE: I tried to find a better explaination of how a "Tape Drive" works, but couldn't.)

I had a C64 for a while, i forgot that it plays games on CASSETES! WHOA i didnt realize that something could be altered on a cassete i thought they where strictly play only!

I just bought Karnov w/ its box from a local store. I had heard it was extremely difficult, but i didn't have too much trouble getting through it. Nothing can beat the fire breathing russian.

Congratulations! A new Karnov "groupie" is born!

Some ass called "Eddie" wrote a bad review about Karnov. On the nes files. I won't post it, it is the love thread, but if you click on the "games" link at the side of the page, scroll down to Karnov and look at the reviews, you'll see it. I'm sharpening my knife now

PS It may upset some people, but at least read the guy's reasons for his dislike of this masterpiece.

Actually, it's not that complicated. It's basically the same technology as PC's use to send data over old-style analogue phone lines.

The Spectrum version was actually my first brush with the infamous fire-breathing Russian. Quite impressive for the platform since it was well coloured, rather than monochrome, but it was slow and quite jerky. Which now that I think about it, is probably a fairly accurate simulation of trying to control a fat man.

There's some information on the Spectrum version over , including some interesting graphics, but apparently distribution of the game for the platform isn't legally allowed. But hey, who cares. Everyone owns a copy of the NES version, right?

famous!?

You are lucky that I can't ban people...

famous!?

You are
It was meant in the best possible way

So you've scored a date with a hot chick/guy and you don't know where to take her/him? Well get set to impress with:

(Disclaimer: I won't be held responsible if your date ends up in Karnov's love shack at the end of the night)

Okay, NOW I'm stoked! A movie ... with Karnov!!! Yeah, I'm ready for this one. Nice find, Daynum!

Karnov and beer for 15$?
Isn't that great, guys?

I think Luke will like that...

Click on "Movies", then the Karnov picture, then watch the trailer

Damn that rules! Especially the part where he breaths fire.

.

Well, it's been nearly a month.....

What CAN'T he do?

Karnov for $1.69! No bull!

enter the following codes
PPLAY15
SAVER

Free shipping and 15% off its already rock bottom price. It's my job to share the Karnov love, so here's me sharing. Also, same 15% off and free shipping for any game they got for sale. Spread the love.

Gyrtohorea on GAme Faqs boards, has a little Karnov in him, or maybe alot.

I'm not sure if this game has been brought up before or not, though I don't recall it being brought up. Anyway, try out... look at the enemies

I had to set my emulator to "All Games" to get it to show up. This could be a nominee for one of the strangest games ever.

I am at a loss for words....

Those mini Karnovs running around with the statue made me laugh.

3rd Row Down theres a pic of the end by Roth.

Uhh..

IMPOSTER!

Ha! That's great! I submitted that pic to Nick M's NES Achievers back when it was going full throttle That's cool to see it in one of the top Karnov searches on Google! Hell yeah!

The Total Karnov Ownage Saga. Who will be next to join?

I hope no one else. Too much Karnov ownage in one place could cause a tear in space/time.

The Total Karnov Ownage Saga. Who will be next to join?

i wanna join but i dont have the movie

Shock and dismay!

Yes, i finally found someone, in town with Karnov!, and it just happens to be my brothers friend, and just happens to be nice enough to give it to me
im not sure, when he will bring it, maybe tonight, may be ayear from now, but im very very happy.

i do hes my favorite of my brothers friend, not just because of this, but hes an awesome guy.

I got it And its so Beautiful.

commandments, man its either im not seeing sdtraight, but quite a few things are missing.

The Kommandments are the basic, core foundations of Karnology, brother. It's up to to further develop the religion and better ways to get money from people.

I sure hope you mean Karnovology (car-nuh-vÃ¤l-uh-gee)... that is the proper scientific/religious way to pronounce it

I have been pondering the concept of Karnology, my brethren, and after spending three days on the highest mountaintop, I was visited by Karnov, who gave unto me The Five Kommandments Of Karnov.

1. Love Thy Karnov.

2. Do Unto Others As You Would Have Them Do Unto Karnov.

3. Thou Shalt Not Worship Any Game Before Karnov.

4. Thou Shalt Give Money To The Church Of Karnology.

5. Thou Shalt Not Cosplay.

That sneaky devil! That's where he went..... I woke up and then he was gone! I cried for like, 10 mintutes, then realized that nobody can solely own Karnov's greatness.
If you see him again, tell him he forgot one of his socks.

In the name of Karnovology, I will do so.

I am awesome, no?

well, since we all know Google is a trustworthy site, and doesn't lie, i put it up to them to decide who would win in a fight. Chuck Norris VS. Karnov....

Campkill - Chuck Norris cheated. He probably has so much time on his hands (between counting to infinity and beating people into last week) that he probably made 1/2 those results himself.

BTW, I was having a little too much fun with googlefight.

well, since we all know Google is a trustworthy site, and doesn't lie, i put it up to them to decide who would win in a fight. Chuck Norris VS. Karnov....

Do we have a non-believer on our hands...?

Does anyone remember the last guy who worshipped another over Karnov?

No?

it's because he was beaten into another dimension!

Campkill, I'd advise you to right your path before you meet the same fate. Karnov is a vengeful god.

Thank 'ee sai. From the way it looks, you wouldn't how much time and effort into it... Ah, well.

It still qualifies as uber-l337, though, as it includes the three coolest things .

Thank 'ee sai. From the way it looks, you wouldn't how much time and effort into it... Ah, well.

It still qualifies as uber-l337, though, as it includes the three coolest things

:wink:

Well, I thought that was a given.

Do we have a non-believer on our hands...?

Does anyone remember the last guy who worshipped another over Karnov?

No?

it's because he was beaten into another dimension!

Campkill, I'd advise you to right your path before you meet the same fate. Karnov is a vengeful god.

i never said i was a non-believer. all i'm trying to say is you guys should realize the the ultimate POWer that is Chuck Norris. i never once doubted Karnov. but facts are facts. there's not much i can do about it.

Commander Campkill, I don't think that google is the most reliable source for the outcome of two giants.... seeing as they have beating Karnov

Barnie's a thug. he don't play.

seems pretty reliable to me....

Oh

And the smack down:
fight was listed as a 'Fight of the Month'.

Now that you've seen the results of that, take a look at .

Oh, and by the way;

I think we should make a poll, and vote for a temporary ban on Campkill. This wavering is getting me emotionally scarred

In that .

But I think we all know that if Karnov and Chuck Norris WERE ever to fight, the entire universe would be destroyed. Let's hope that never happens...

First off this thread is all about our love of Mr. Karnov! (And his sexy mustache and beer belly)

Secondly, it's BARNEY. (I should know I was a babysitting slave for my sister for many years). No wonder I'm damaged goods, I had to sit through that damn Barney game for the Genesis over and over.

Oh, and by the way;

i'll admit defeat, although that isn't a very fair fight. this is my newer username. my old one is campkill1387.... now....

that's more of a fair fight....

I bet Karnov still has a place in his heart for you. Or, you know, near his heart. You'd end up in his stomach when he was done eating you.

omg, all the Karnov love here is great! I also found some great things on google about Karnov such as this !

In that .

Teeheeehee it said "whale"

If Karnov and Norris had a love child, it would be the ultimate being.

Anyway, Karnov is great.

In that .

Teeheeehee it said "whale"

If Karnov and Norris had a love child, it would be the ultimate being.

Anyway, Karnov is great.

no one can be better than Karnov no matter what not even the 2nd best being still wouldnt beat Karnov. Karnov is so much better than everyone its jsut not possible.

even God?

even God?

even god....

even God?

even god....

thems fightin' words 'round here boy

even God?

even god....

Screw the rainstorm, that lightning's gonna get ya

Please. God loves Karnov. God understands.

It could be argued by some that Karnov God.

EXACTLY!!

Imagine Karnov taking on the orginal cast of Mighty Morphin POWer Rangers..now THAT would be halarious

Hilarious to everyone except the orginal cast of Mighty Morphin POWer Rangers

Hilarious to everyone except the orginal cast of Mighty Morphin POWer Rangers

i was thinking the same thing.... those poor, poor Mighty Moorphin POWuh Raaaangaaas

Serves 'em right. They tried to fill the shoes of Super Sentai Jetman, but they just weren't man enough.

As soon as they set thier eyes on his muscular torso and fine mustache, they would just simply implode, as thier simple minds couldn't handle the fact that such a fine being is gracing them with his musky odours and presence.

That is the weirdest bit of love I've ever seen ha

the first one.... lame.

the second one was awesome. it fit the song

Thank you all for these fine lessons in Karnovology. Now I must strive with greater urgency to acquire (again; I had NES Karnov when it was new & lost it via an ex-roomate's vile robbery) this panasea for all things NES.

Damn well said.

A bit of a bump, but it's important! And they say it has three different endings... Depending on the final boss you fight, maybe? Hmm.

So OSG may be right about God loving Karnov! At least until Game Over.

Holy shit... Well, I'll give it a shot and see what these endings are, as I would've obviously messed up the hack not knowing that... heh

Man, Karnov was ripped off in the U.S...
I always thought he should have had a better ending. And cut scenes. I wonder how long it'll be before that "his name was Karnov" phrase will be in someone's sig...

The love is spreading.

Yes, old, but it's Karnov!

Went for the Karnov, stayed for the rest of it. That was some funny stuff !

i can't remember if this has already been posted, but i thought you Karnov freaks would find it interesting....

Japanese intro in English: (video)

Japanese ending in English: (screenshots)

translation patch of the Japanese NES ROM:

It's been about a month-and-a-half since we've had any love, so here we go:

:)

It's been about a month-and-a-half since we've had any love, so here we go:

Makes me want to play Karnov now. Good job on that man, and all the others. I love that 8-bit intro sound in the beginning. Did you make that or rip it from a game?

I made that in NerdTracker2. It's one of my more simple tunes, but I think it's kind of catchy. Also, thanks for the compliments man :)

You'll always be No. 1 in my heart, Karny.

did i tell you guys that i ordered the movie?

well it came in today.

Finally got round to finishing Karnov the other day. I feel I am now officially a member of the NES Files Karnov Appreciation Society, 2 years late for the party.

Better late than never, because Karnov is.